Procrastination is the number one deadly mistake both parents and students make, and thinking that “we have enough time”, “we can wait” is the wrong approach. Students procrastinate about almost everything; homework, reading, research, chores, essays, applications, virtual tours, internships, showering, exercise, practice, asking for help etc. Whether it’s waiting to start a project two days before due date (assigned two weeks prior) or starting home work at 11pm, procrastination will always lead to failure.
Dual parents, single parents alike are so busy they too procrastinate. “It’s to early to start planning for college”, “we can wait to take SAT your senior year”. Parents then wonder why their child is stressed out of their mind. I’m never surprised when I see parent’s reaction when I tell them the cost of NYU, University of Southern California, or Duke is $75,000-$85,000 a year. They always ask me if I’m sure. Seventy five percent of the parents I meet fail in setting up a funding plan.
There are many strategies a parent cans help their teen with procrastination. It’s as easy as a psychological switch from “having” to do something to “choosing” to do something. How you choose your words is extremely important. For instance what tasks “are you” working on today rather than what task do you “have to” do today. Expressing interest in their schoolwork, making sure they are not overcommitting, setting mini goals with mini rewards to follow. Lead by example by showing them, rather than telling, the more you push the more they will resist. It’s a fine balance, and remember at the end of the day their procrastination is their problem rather than yours. There’s two old adages’ I like to share with my students called the 5 P’s. “Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance”, and “People don’t Plan to fail they fail to Plan”. Give them clear examples like an Olympic Athlete. The Olympic athlete doesn’t suddenly wake up the year before Olympic competition and start training. They started 4 years prior with a goal and then set a PLAN. By showing them how to plan, using time blocks for each task and completing them gets them closer to their goal.
Many students and parents have been told by friends, relatives as well as teachers that the most important grade is 11th grade. There is a tremendous amount of truth to this statement. However your freshman year is just as important. Your freshman year sets the bar, and establishes your work ethic for the coming years. In addition, freshman year is huge jump and adjustment. Within 10 weeks after graduating from middle school the demands of academics, social peer pressure, adolescents (hormones raging), plays a big part in success and failure. Research studies have shown that 9th grade is “make or break year” (https://eric.ed.gov/?id=EJ903523). Each year is a building block from the prior year and it starts with 9th grade. So achieving the best grades is very important. Let me explain, each university has min GPA and if your freshman year starts off mediocre 3.25 climbing out that hole will be difficult. Can it be done? Of course it can but I don’t suggest it. It’s easier to maintain a 4.0-4.25 slip a little in sophomore year but come back strong in Junior Year. Most high school freshman and sophomore years are perquisites for harder classes (see mistake # 6) again they are building blocks for the next year. You don’t want to put yourself in position 1st semester of 11th grade and find out that the min GPA for a certain University is 3.85 and you are at 3.5. It will be very difficult and added stress to a course load that resembles college
11th grade is just as important, your course loaded will be tough, you’ll have SAT/ACT to study, AP exams, extracurricular activities, and clubs. It all starts in 9th grade and developing good study habits and time management will pay dividends
Sports are a great way to obtain admission and scholarship opportunities. Students involved in sports learn very early about politics, habits, time management. They also learn mental & physical toughness. All this leads to values of discipline, self-confidence, and sacrifice. They learn real life lessons, like how to handle defeat and rise from it. Student Athletes maintain physical fitness; often feel more mentally fit and more confident about themselves
Playing competitive sports have more benefits and by far outweigh the negative.
However, if no boundaries are set by both student athlete and parents, grades can be affected. Most parents never played sports, ever taken Honor or AP classes. They don’t understand the physical & mental demands placed on a daily basis. Student athletes are attempting to balance sports, social life, family time, school projects and difficult classes. Aside from high school a majority are playing Club/Travel with no limit on time and high demand. At the very least High School have limits on practice time each week. Sports are very specialized today and many are focused on one sport year round. They have lessons, practice with their own team, and they travel on the weekends. Both parents and coaches can be overbearing, become prideful; add pressure to practice more, to be more committed. Not realizing how much homework and studying that needs to be accomplished. Parents start prioritizing the sport rather than education. When parents do not set the boundaries for themselves and coaches it can will affect grades. I’ve firsthand witnessed this as I was a coach for high level club team that traveled thru out California and Nation with my team. I’ve seen young men and women fall behind, not getting enough sleep, fall behind in classes, and not do as well as they could’ve if parents set boundaries. Many never play at the next level or even receive a full scholarship. Grades matter to college coaches as they rely on those grades to award the max amount of money to any recruit. There’s Athletic Aid and Merit Aid (which is based on Grades, SAT, Leadership, etc).
This can be a little lengthy but worth the time to read. First you need to know that College Admission officers and their reps are assigned geographic territories. So they are very familiar with school rankings, reports, strength of curriculum and achievement levels and other information. Taking core classes (non-Honor, or AP classes) to get by with a grade “A” will not be sufficient enough for fairly, very or highly selective schools. Furthermore if your high school offers Honor or AP classes I would suggest taking them. By taking either one you are demonstrating to the universities your desire for higher education. In addition admission officers are searching for candidates that can handle the rigors of college, challenging courses that would signal you have academic grit to succeed at their university. Many Students are being guided by counselors at their local high schools to ensure they meet state requirements. In California those requirements are A-G both UC and CSU universities require these to be completed and can be core, honors or AP classes. In Texas, students must meet the requirements of Texas’s Foundations High School Program. In Florida there are five choices. Every state has its own requirements for their public university school system. Each Private University also has its own requirements as well; For Instance UC School may only require 3 years of Mathematics, and 3 years of Science. Whereas in Ivy League school may require 4 years of Mathematics and 3 years of laboratory Science with 4 years including Physics. Make sure you are taking all the correct classes need to be admitted to the universities of choice. Don’t make any assumptions and do your homework. Taking AP of Honor classes can help your transcripts look impressive, but more isn’t always better. In addition, many parents and students are under the impression that taking AP classes will give them college credit and lower the cost of tuition. The answer is Yes/No. Every university is different and you must verify what there guidelines are some of these classes may not translate to any College Credit and vary from each institution. Therefore you are not saving any money. Some universities may accept the class as a placement which will allow you take advance courses or you may take a similar course. If you take the AP exam and score a 3 that doesn’t look as favorable as 4 or 5’s. Highly & selective Universities expect their candidates to be enrolled in the most challenging courses. Students need to focus on those classes they have great interest, fits towards career path, major and university. Also keep in mind, if your student (should be) is involved in extracurricular activities like; clubs, service projects, sports, band, cheer, or hold leadership positions. They will be extremely be very stressed and busy especially during their junior year. Here’s an example of students taking the wrong classes. I have counseled students that are English, journalism, or Art majors. They are extremely strong at these subjects and very weak at mathematics. They are in 11th grade taking AP Stats or AP Calculus, struggling, risking a B/C. Instead they should be taking an Honors Mathematics class or just Calculus. Their emphasis should be (English majors) AP Lit, AP Lang and (Art majors) AP Art and AP Studio Art. It doesn’t make sense to take an AP class for higher GPA if you are struggling with subject that doesn’t pertain to your major.